So Long, Farewell

until the 30th anyways. I'm about to be internetless again. I was going to try to get some posts set up today so that there'd still be something to read while I was gone, but seeing how I'm just now leaving work (an hour after I'm supposed to), that obviously didn't happen.

But, when I return I hope to have some new crafts to post and look forward to catching up on everyone out there in blog world.

Happy Thanksgiving to you all!

Christmas Gift Idea: Bird’s Nest Planter

Earlier this year I saw Martha make these rustic “bird’s nest” planters that held paper whites. I thought they’d make a great gift idea for some of hubby’s clients, but I didn’t know where I’d find paper whites at an affordable price.

Well, last night I stopped by the Christmas Tree Shop on my way home from work because someone sent me a coupon for 20% off your entire purchase. Lo and behold, when I walked in the door, right there were packages of paper white bulbs with a pot and simple instructions on how to plant for $3.99!

At that price, I should be able to make each bird’s nest planter with flowers for less than $10 each which is definitely a reasonable price to spend on gifts. If I decide not to go with the bird’s nest planters, I could easily wrap some nice burlap fabric around the pot and tie a ribbon with some embellishments around it too. That’d be even cheaper than $10.

Want to make your own bird’s nest planter? Click here to get the instructions.

And, if you live near a Christmas Tree Shop, here is your own 20% off coupon to use:

Homemade Granola

I finally remembered to grab the recipe from home so I could post this. My hubby loves having a snack of granola and yogurt. I’ve been meaning to make him some more homemade granola for a long time but kept putting it off because I had remembered it as a long process. Well my memory didn’t serve me correctly because making homemade granola couldn’t be easier. And, when my mom-in-law tells me she bought all the ingredients for it because I make the best, it’s hard to say no.

So, a couple weekends ago I whipped up a batch and we’ve been enjoying it ever since. Thought you might enjoy the recipe too. I have to thank hubby’s aunt for passing it on to me.

First, place whatever nuts you desire in a pan and toast them to develop their full flavor. As Rachael Ray says, “your nose knows” when they’re done. Just keep an eye on them so they don’t burn.

This time I used sesame seeds, sunflower seeds, ground flax seed, and slivered almonds.

Meanwhile, in microwave safe bowl, combine these ingredients:

Microwave until the sugar starts to dissolve and it’s easy to stir.

In a LARGE bowl, measure out 10 cups of oats.

Add your toasted nuts and stir to combine.

Pour on the liquid ingredients and stir until all the oats and nuts are moistened.

Next, add in whatever dried fruit you like.

I used golden raisins and craisins. I’ve used dried cherries and blueberries before which is also very yummy. Stir until the fruit is evenly distributed.

In a parchment lined jelly roll pan, spread the granola in a layer that is about 1/2” thick.

Bake in a preheated oven until the edges are browned and the middle starts to feel firm to the touch.

NOTE: You’ll think you need to bake it longer than you actually do. When you pull it out of the oven, it will still be kind of sticky and soft. As it cools it will harden. Once the edges are browned, take it out otherwise you’ll end up with burned granola.

I tried to show you the difference between the baked (in the pan) and the unbaked (in the bowl) above, but they look too similar on my camera. You can see that the edges of the pan are browned, though.

I immediately transfer the baked granola to another storage container to cool. As it cools, I use my hands to break it up into chunks.

One batch filled 1/2 of one of those giant animal cracker containers. This will last us for quite awhile and it is so delicious when served on top of yogurt.

AUNT NANCY’S GRANOLA

10 cups oats
1 1/2 cup brown sugar
1 cup honey
3/4 cup canola oil
1 cup almonds
1/2 cup ground flax seeds
1 cup sesame seeds
1/2 cup sunflower seeds
2 cups worth of dried fruit

Place nuts/seeds in skillet and toast over medium to medium-high heat until they reach desired toastiness. Place oats in a large bowl. In a microwave safe container, heat the brown sugar, honey and oil for 1.5 minutes to make it easier to stir and combine them. Add the toasted nuts to the oats and stir to combine. Pour the liquid mixture over the dry ingredients and stir until everything is coated. Add the dried fruit. Stir to combine. In parchment lined jelly roll sheets, flatten granola into 1/2” thick layer. Bake at 350 degrees for 20 minutes, checking often. It’s done when the edges start to brown and the middle is firmer to the touch. Remember, it will harden more as it cools. Store in an airtight container and enjoy for many days/weeks on top of yogurt.

Personally, this version is much tastier and much healthier than any version you could buy in the store. It is also much more budget friendly.

Time for a New Do

This Saturday I’m going for my first haircut in over 6 months. It couldn’t happen to fall on a better day because that night also happens to be the third annual Mayor’s Ball for our hometown and seeing how my hubby is on the city council, I kinda have to go to those sort of things and look presentable while attending.

I don’t think my split ends and funky mom-in-law trimmed bangs will go too well with the fancy dress I’m recycling from two years ago. That’s another thing. Hopefully no one will notice that I’m wearing the same dress I’ve already worn to two other political functions - albeit county level ones, but still. Another $400 for a dress is just not something in the budget right now.

Anyway. Back to the hair.

I’ve mentioned before that I get in these cycles where I’ll chop my hair short and then let it grow out for a few years and wear it long before chopping it off again. Currently, I’m in the let it grow out stage and it’s finally below my shoulder again. If it was up to me, I’d chop it back into the bob I sported most of this past year because I totally loved it. With my flat iron, it was super easy to style. Katie Holmes was my inspiration:

   

Hubby loves when I change my hair up, though, because then he feels like he’s kinda married to a “different woman every day”. Whatever makes him happy. Only problem is, my flat iron bit the dust a couple months ago and they no longer make it so I’m having trouble finding an affordable replacement I’m happy with. Thus, my go to style of late has been leaving it naturally curly and I’m completely over it. It seems no matter what I do or what products I use the frizz takes over by midday. It’s got to go!

I’m not very talented with a blow dryer and that is why I loved the bob because the flat iron fixed EVERYTHING.

In the past I’ve turned to things like this to help me out:

But, let’s be honest here, those hairstyles don’t look realistic no matter who’s head you plop them on. (And no, that’s not me in those silly photos in case your eyesight has gone.)

Enter Google. How I love Google. What did we ever do without Google?

A quick search for “medium hairstyles” and “long hairstyles” resulted in the following selections I like:

I don’t know which way to go. I really like the bang on Mandy Moore & Jessica Simpson and Eva Longoria’s simple straight layers, but the flirtyness of Eva Mendes asymmetrical do is super cute too. Only problem is, I can do the straight hair easily enough thanks to a flat iron, but the styles on the bottom look like I’d have to be pretty skilled with a blow dryer and then a curling iron and some good styling products to keep my naturally curly hair from frizzing out when I try to relax it into a softer wave.

Guess I’ll let my hairstylist make the final decision for me on Saturday and hopefully she’ll be able to give me some stellar tips too on how to style it because I really would love to go with something closer to Eva Mendes style.

Then again, I could always just have her style it like this for the Mayor’s Ball:

What the heck was Drew Barrymore thinking when she got out of the stylist’s chair that night? I definitely want to avoid having bouffant hair like that!

Oh, one other picture that came up on my Google search for “medium hairstyles”:

Again, not quite the look I’m going for, but Josh Holloway is pretty dreamy.

Tell me your opinion. Which style should I go with? Any hair products you found that work great on naturally curly hair? How about tips for having great success with using a blow dryer?

Pioneer Woman’s Cinnamon Rolls

I think I mentioned that I recently started following The Pioneer Woman on her blog. She always has me cracking up and her recipes are pretty good amazing too!

About a week ago I decided to make a batch of PW’s cinnamon rolls. Click here for the recipe.

I read the comments before I started and saw that some people had problems with the melted butter oozing out of the dough as they tried to roll it up. I experienced this same problem.

The first half of the dough I used melted butter and it oozed all out over the counters, the front of the dishwasher and the floor. If I hadn’t been so aggravated that I didn’t follow the suggestions of others my hands hadn’t been so covered in butter and cinnamon and sugar, I would have taken the chance to snap a photo. Trust me. It was NOT a pretty sight!

The second half of the dough I only softened the butter and that way seemed to work much better. Both ways were still pretty messy to cut, but they turned out delicious.

One batch made one 9 x 13 of 15 rolls. Here they are before the frosting:

And here they are after I added the delicious coffee/maple frosting:

 

It also made 5 round trays of 7 rolls each.

 

 

I was wanting to freeze the 5 round pans so hubby could enjoy them for breakfasts throughout the upcoming weeks. PW says you can freeze them at any stage, even after they’ve been iced. I decided to take her word for it and after pouring the frosting on and allowing them to cool completely, I covered them tightly with aluminum foil and placed them in the freezer with directions on top for hubby to reheat them. According to PW, you can either let them thaw and then heat them one at a time, or plop them in the oven frozen and with the foil on for about 20 minutes.

Hubby chose the frozen method and they came out just as heavenly tasting as those we ate fresh.

Have you tried any of Pioneer Woman’s recipes? If so, which ones?

More Tests

This morning on my way to work I received a phone call from my dr’s office. I think he must have received my x-ray results because now he wants me to go for a CT scan prior to my colonoscopy.

Hopefully whatever he saw is nothing serious, but at the same time, hopefully it’s something tangible so we can actually start the work of fixing the problem instead of trying to figure out what the problem is.

On another note, I have a blog post on homemade granola all ready to go except for the actual quantities. Seems the version I have with me is not the same version I used  even though it came from the same person. Who knows. Guess that’s what happens when two different people right down the same recipe given verbally. I’ll try to remember to right down the version I actually used and post it tomorrow.

A Fun Way To Spend A Thursday Morning

We’re still on a quest to find out what has been causing my stomach issues since this past June. After all the tests my internist ran kept coming up normal, I decided to head to a gastroenterologist instead to see if he could figure out anything. I had my first appointment with him a week ago and was given orders to have an x-ray of my upper GI and small bowel as well as a colonoscopy.

Fun stuff I tell ya! Stuff I thought I’d be dealing with when I was in my 50s not when I was 28. But, I guess when you have a family history of colon cancer (my paternal grandma died from it when she was 55), they want you to have these sort of tests sooner if you’re having issues.

Yesterday was my lucky day to go and drink barium milk shakes. They’re so delicious! If you haven’t had one, make sure you schedule your next upper GI and small bowel x-ray stat.

Here’s the lovely little cell room where you too could spend a few hours. It has everything you could ever want – a cold floor, hard seat, florescent lighting, and drafts. It’s absolutely fabulous! Of course you have the option of walking out and sitting in the hallway if you don’t want to stay in here, but there is one problem.

See those blue things sitting in the corner? You know. The ones that open in the back so that you’re whole rear end is visible for the world to see? That’s what you’ll be wearing if you decide to leave your isolation cell cushy room to go and enjoy the slightly warmer and less sterile hallway.

What’s that I hear? You want a photo?

Oops. That won’t work. How about this one?

What? You thought I was going to post my rear end flapping in the breeze? Ha! Not when you have junk in the trunk like me! Oh and see that crazy fake smile on my face? That’s what happens to you when you’re locked in that little room while you wait for them to come and force three cups of barium milkshakes down your throat.

Thankfully my lady was so nice and allowed me to wear a second gown as a jacket to cover up my backside. It made for a stellar fashion statement with my black and grey striped knee socks. Let me tell ya.

Besides the accommodations and beverages, the x-rays really were easy as pie. And, here are a few words for my fellow cellmates patients from yesterday: JUST DRINK THE STUFF ALREADY! Don’t complain about it! Trust me, they know it tastes awful. You complaining about it is not going to make the process any easier on you or them. Sure you have to rock back and forth and from side to side to stir up the barium once you ingest it, but lying still and holding your breath really isn’t that hard people.

I was such a stellar patient the doctor told the x-ray technician to hire me. I  have to admit, her job looks pretty fun. Maybe a career change is somewhere in my future. It would be closer to the pre-med track I was on in college than my current job as an office manager. And, I’ve never been more proud of my small bowel. The fact that it moved the barium through it fast allowed me to get out of there after only two hours instead of four.

Afterwards, I finally chowed down on some breakfast with a chaser of milk of magnesia. Now that stuff is nasty!

An Easier Way to Blog

I’m sure many of you already know about this, but I just discovered it yesterday and I’m L-O-V-I-N-G it!

At work we recently started using Windows Messaging for intra-office communication. For some reason, the program wasn’t loaded on my computer so I logged on to download it.

I was so excited when I saw it came with the program called “Windows Live Writer.”

This little discovery has made blogging sooooo much easier for me. I don’t know about you, but I dreaded the posts that included pictures because it was so cumbersome to move them around and get them in the right location. This program allows me to insert pictures when and where I want them instead of having to upload them all before I start a post. Plus, it has easy options for changing the border on the pictures and a whole bunch of other stuff. Plus now I can do things like annoy everyone cross out words if I want to. Always wondered how people did those strikethroughs. Ha! Now I know.

So, from now on dear readers, my pictures will have BORDERS. And, my posts will contain strikethroughs. And, I’ll feel like I’m finally up to speed with how to get this whole blogging thing working a little quicker and easier which hopefully will lead to more frequent posting.

And yes, did any of you catch that I do my blogging from work? Shh. Don’t tell the boss. J/K! He already knows and seeing how I’m such a speedy worker and have my work done two hours after I get here for the day, most days get spent surfing the net, making design sketches for my house, playing games on Facebook or blogging. Yeah, it’s a tough job, but someone has to do it! Now if only I could get myself to channel that free time into something productive and profitable like moving my Divine Creations shop from my stupid web host to Etsy I might have a little more success.

Wahoo! BIG Wins!

Last night was a good night - a R-E-A-L-L-Y good night!

If you're a Republican that is.

I know a lot of people don't talk about politics on their blogs, but politics is just part of my life. After all, my husband is a politician.

From the top to the bottom, Republicans had HUGE victories in our state. Mr. Obama's visits did nothing to help his fellow Democrats, and as a result of picking up another "R" seat locally, looks like my hubby may get to serve as Mayor again next year.

Oh election nights are so much more fun when your party wins!

Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Bundt Cake

(Sorry for this unappetizing photo. The guys at work got to the cake before I could take a picture. It tastes MUCH better than it looks. Promise!)

Yesterday was yet another birthday at work. In trying to stay in theme with fall I decided to go for something pumpkin flavored.

The recipe was really simple and the guys enjoyed it thoroughly.

PUMPKIN CHOCOLATE CHIP BUNDT CAKE

1 box yellow cake mix

15 oz. canned pumpkin
2/3 cup buttermilk
3 large eggs
1 cup chocolate chips
1 can cream cheese frosting

food dye

cocoa powder

Mix all ingredients except chocolate chips together for 2-3 minutes or until fluffy. Stir in chocolate chips. Pour into a greased and floured bundt pan and bake at 350 degrees for about 45 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in the middle comes out clean. Let cool in pan and then invert onto serving plate.

For icing, I used 1 can cream cheese frosting and added cocoa powder to it to give it a brown hue and a little bit of a chocolate taste. If I had more chocolate chips, I would have prefered to melt those and drizzle those on top or use a jar of chocolate icing. I zap the frosting in the microwave for 30 seconds until it gets to a pourable consistency and then just drizzle over cake. I normally only use about a half a can. I then mixed up some powdered sugar, a little bit of milk and vanilla and some red and yellow food coloring to make an orange glaze to drizzle on top of the cocoa frosting. To decorate, I picked up some pumpkin spice candy corn from Walmart and sprinkled those around the cake. In hindsight, I should have just separated a bit of the cream cheese frosting and dyed that orange before I added in the cocoa to the rest, but my mind was a little distracted. Oh well! And, I'm not a fan of candy corn or Walmart, but this stuff was good! They also had chocolate caramel and caramel apple flavors.

Hope you all have a great Halloween today if you celebrate that or else Happy Reformation Day to the rest of us. Seeing how my hubs is out of town until tomorrow, I'm going to celebrate with a bowl of pumpkin soup, my tivo'd shows and some cross stitch.

News From a Dear Friend

Today I heard from my dear friend, Sonja.

We met in 2006 when she was looking for a place to live out east. She and her daughter had moved from Colorado to be closer to her fiancee who lived near Philadelphia. She was also a Christian. In fact, she was an answer to a prayer that I didn't even know I prayed. We roomed together for the year before I got married and in fact the four of us (adding my hubby in the mix) lived together for a couple of months after we got married until her wedding. Sonja became like an older sister to me. Us two Colorado girls had grand times out here on the east coast.

However, shortly after she got married, her hubby got transferred to Chicago and we were sad to part ways. A few months later, hubby and I bought the house we're remodeling in a city a few hours drive from Chicago. Well, a few weeks after that, she called to let me know that her hubby now got transferred to the same city where we bought the house! Does God work in awesome ways or what? Once again we would be able to have our "sister" times and raise our children together like we always wanted. We were super excited and anxious for hubby and I to move there full-time.

We took this picture the day before my wedding in October 2007. We were hiking in Rocky Mountain National Park and enjoying a fabulous day back in our home state.

This picture was taking in January 2008 at Sonja's wedding in Costa Rica. Her daughter, Jamie, and I were the bridesmaids. I was so happy to be there to witness Sonja marrying the man she had been waiting for for many years. She had Jamie at 19 from a prior marriage while she was in the Air Force and due to some personal reasons, ended up raising Jamie as a single mom for the next 14 years or so.

This past year Sonja and I lost touch for various reasons and a couple days ago, God laid it on both our hearts to contact the other. She sent me a text message, but I never received it because I don't have text messaging on my phone. I sent her an e-mail a couple days ago and when I didn't get a response, I figured I must have the wrong address.

Well, today as I was heating up my lunch, my cell rang and it was a number I didn't recognize. I answered it anyway (which I normally never do because I'm cheap and don't want to waste minutes!) and I'm sure glad I did because it was Sonja.

We settled things between us and then she broke the news. I thought she was going to say she was pregnant and I was going to be very happy for her but sad at the same time because we wanted to be pregnant together. At this point, I'd gladly take the news that she's pregnant because the news she shared with me is scary.

Sonja has Stage 4 CANCER.

Her chances are 3-5%.

It started in her breasts and metastasized to her lymph nodes and bones.

Barring a miracle from God, Sonja won't be on this earth much longer.

But, SHE BELIEVES IN MIRACLES and so do I.

Her outlook is so positive right now as she is going through radiation and chemo. Next week she is shaving her hair and starting to wear a wig. She is trusting in our Lord to heal her and use her healing as a witness of His strength and power. She'll never be able to carry children again, but she and her hubby were undergoing fertility treatment and they do have one embryo waiting to be carried by a surrogate once Sonja wins this battle.

She has so much to live for and yet at age 35 she's been given a death sentence from cancer. I definitely do not understand the ways of the Lord, but I know his ways are good. I know he can heal. I know he can work miracles. We need a miracle now.

If you feel so inclined, please be praying for Sonja. She's in a lot of pain right now since it's in her bones. Please be praying for her daughter, Jamie. She's a junior in high school. Please be praying for her husband of less than 2 years. Please be praying for her mom, who already lost her other child to cancer at age 19. Most of all, please be praying for a MIRACLE and that more people would come to know Christ as their Savior as a result of Sonja's cancer.

This photo is of Sonja and her husband and daughter. It too was taken in October 2007. We now know that they're pretty sure she had the cancer long before this photo was ever taken.

Oh, and remember, NOTHING is more important than friendship and love. Never go a day, let alone a whole year, without letting those who are important to you know you love them and care for them.

Why Can't I Have a Snow Day?

I'm so jealous right now of all my friends in Colorado. Seems they're now enjoying their 2nd snow day of the year. Crazy the amounts of snow they're received this early in the season. When I was in school we were lucky if we had maybe two snow days the whole entire year.

The skiing out there is going to be A-M-A-Z-I-N-G this year due to all the snow they've been getting! Maybe hubby and I will be able to actually take advantage of the week at a condo in Aspen someone gave us. March seems like a good time to shoot for so we'll have to see.

I really wish they'd send some of that snow my way because this Colorado girl is seriously missing it. What I wouldn't give to have a snow day right now!

Pumpkin Swirl Brownies

I'm enjoying all things pumpkin this fall so I wanted to try this recipe I found last year - pumpkin swirl brownies. I made these on Saturday and they turned out more like a cross between a cake and a brownie because the batter was REALLY thick. But oh my they are DELICIOUS!

(photo courtesy of Martha Stewart.com)

PUMPKIN SWIRL BROWNIES
(a modified version of a Martha Stewart recipe)

Ingredients:
1 stick unsalted butter
3 ounces bittersweet chocolate, chopped
3 ounces semi-sweet chocolate chips
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 tsp baking powder
½ tsp salt
1¾ cups sugar
4 large eggs
1 Tbsp vanilla
1¼ cups solid-packed pumpkin
¼ cup vegetable oil
1 tsp ground cinnamon
¼ tsp ground nutmeg

1. Preheat oven to 350°. Spray a 9” square baking dish with non-stick spray.

2. Melt chocolate and butter in heatproof bowl set over a pan of simmering water, stirring occasionally until smooth.

3. Whisk together flour, baking powder and salt in a large bowl; set aside. Beat sugar, eggs and vanilla until fluffy and well combined, 3 to 5 minutes (over high speed in order to get fluffy). Beat in flour mixture.

4. Divide batter between two bowls. Stir chocolate mixture into one bowl. In other bowl, stir in pumpkin, oil, cinnamon and nutmeg. Transfer half of chocolate batter to pan and smooth out. Top with half of pumpkin batter. Repeat with remaining batter.

5. Use a table knife to gently swirl the two batters together to create a marble effect.

6. Bake until set, about 40 to 45 minutes. Let cool in pan before cutting into squares.

NOTE: The recipe says it makes 16 squares. I doubled everything so I could make it in a 9 x 13 because we eat much larger size brownies than is a "typical" serving. It was really thick and took a lot longer to cook so next time I’ll probably just 1½ it. The original recipe also calls for all bittersweet chocolate, nuts sprinkled on top before baking, and cayenne pepper.

His Love & Forgiveness are Extravagant

First off, thank you so much to all those who contacted me to let me know they're praying for me and that I'm not alone in what I was going through.

While I never enjoy the times of refining fire, they are completely necessary and I'm so glad that God places those times in my life.

I e-mailed my hubby a copy of the post after I wrote it just to let him know how sorry I was and that God is working in my heart.

Well, when I got home Friday night, my hubby wasted no time modeling the extravagant love and forgiveness of our Lord and Savior.

When I got home from work he was so happy to see me and we enjoyed a nice dinner out that night with his parents to celebrate the end of hay season. He postponed his trip until this Tuesday so he could stay home a few more days with me. Saturday morning he woke up shortly before me and when I came downstairs to get us breakfast, he told me he was making me breakfast and made me Danish pancakes. Later that day he gave me a belated 2nd anniversary gift - a beautiful strand of pearls. Yesterday we had an awesome day at church and then went and walked 94 acres of farm land that we're looking into purchasing. It was a glorious day and I was so blessed to be the recipient of extravagant forgiveness and love beyond anything I could have asked for.

If my human husband acts this way, I can only imagine how much more my Heavenly Father is waiting to show his extravagant love, mercy and forgiveness.

Why?

I feel like I've written this post before and maybe I have, but I just need to use this space to process today. I may lose some readers, but I don't care. I have to be real and I need to put my thoughts down someplace where I can look back on them weeks, months, years from now and see (hopefully) how far I've come in this whole sanctification thing.

The statement of Paul's found in Romans 7:15 (NASB) sums up exactly what is running through my head right now:

"For what I am doing, I do not understand;
for I am not practicing what I would like to,
but I am doing the very thing I hate."

I don't know about you, but I am selfish. I say things I don't mean just because I'm so angry at the moment. I don't stop to consider what impact I'm having on the other person until long after the words have left my mouth or the glares have left my eyes. I'm a bear my soul, raise my voice and let it all fly type of person and then expect it all to be okay a few minutes later.

You know - "Whew! Got that off my chest. Now, let's move on." Only problem is most time the other person responds with something like - "Move on? Are you out of your mind? Do you have any idea how much what you just did/said hurt me? You want me just to get over it and move on?"

I'm not proud to say that this has been a life long struggle for me. When I used to watch my siblings during the summer, I'd make them call me drill Sargent and do push ups if they weren't doing their chores. Sure, we laugh about it now, but it definitely wasn't great for sibling bonding or one of the finest points of my childhood. In sixth grade I got sent to the Principal's office because I got in a fight on the playground over getting on/off the swings. Yeah, a great gal I was. The girl and I ended up becoming best friends for the rest of junior high, but still our relationship could have started in a much better way. And, I'm still too embarrassed to even come close to sharing about the numerous ways I have scarred my husband in the short five years we dated and two years we've been married. In fact, there are some days where I look back and think it's a miracle he married me at all.

Yeah, it been a daily dying to sin my whole life and it is a battle I'm seriously losing.

And, it seems that these last few months especially, the devil is trying everything he can to use this hideous sin I struggle with to drive a major wedge between me and the man I so desperately love - though my words and actions hardly reflect it at times.

Instead of being a wife last night who recognized that her man had been through an incredibly long day - up at the crack of dawn to unload 100s of bales of hay, offload our neighbors new staircase, and load up at least two more trailer loads of hay - and nicely giving him some time to unwind, watch the ballgame, take a phone call or two if he needed to, and maybe even give him a back rub to ease his aching muscles, I chose to pick a fight over one of his phone calls mainly because I felt it could have been shorter and he could have been spending more time with me. Yeah, I'm a real catch, huh?

The stupid thing is the whole time while he's on the phone I'm saying to myself in my head, "Let it go. You know if you react and get upset it's just going to end in a lot of hurt for both of you. Just let it go." As much as I wanted to do that, the very moment he got off the phone I turned into this person I despise. What could have been a great rest of the evening together instead ended up with two seriously hurting people and an empty spot in the bed next to me. First time that has ever happened (and hopefully the last) in our short two years of marriage.

Paul's words come back to haunt me, "For what I am doing, I do not understand; for I am not practicing what I would like to, but I am doing the very thing I hate."

Why? Why do I let myself act this way? Why do I do things that I know will cause sorrow and grief and pain? Am I just some sick, demented person who enjoys inflicting torture on others? Heck, I should just stick some nails into a 2x4 and start whacking that thing around. The end result would be the same...a child of God left feeling like chopped meat because of something I did or said.

In fact, I've actually physically done that to someone. You see, I did it to Christ on the cross. My sin left him with lashes across his back, nail scars in his hands and feet, a crown of thorns crushed into his scalp and a sword driven into his side. I've already made a human being, the Son of God, look like nothing but a piece of butchered flesh. Why do I insist on doing it to sons and daughters of God still?

I'm so frustrated and angry at myself right now. No, it's not just because I've already been promised that I will never receive flowers from my husband again (as a result of some stupid thing I did last time he sent them to me) or that my husband hasn't talked to me since the argument last night and most likely won't until he returns in a week from the business trip he leaves for tomorrow. These things bother me and hurt me deeply, but I'm frustrated and angry at myself because I still choose sin.

I've been redeemed by the Creator of the universe and I still choose to thumb my nose at his sacrifice when I treat others this way.

I'm sick and tired of it. And I'm scared. I'm scared that I'll lose my husband as a result of my anger. I'm scared that if the Lord ever blesses us with a child that I'll be a mother who beats her children. I'm scared that my actions cause my witness for Christ to be so dim that nobody even sees Him when they look at me.

There is only one place I can go from here; only one place where I can turn for my marriage to be restored and for the hurt I caused to be repaired. That place is at the foot of the cross.

There are dear friends I know who would give everything they have for one more day with their husband, one more day with their dad. Meanwhile, I'm hurting the spouse God has blessed me with like there's no tomorrow.

What a wretched person I am. If it weren't for the saving grace of the Lord, there would be no hope that I can become a better person. A better wife. A better sister, daughter, friend and witness. But thankfully, God has promised that He will continue to refine me and mold me to become more like his Son. Because He is not content for me to stay the way I am. I just wish I wouldn't hurt people so badly as I go through His refining fire.

Corn Chowder & French Bread

Every Christmas Eve my mom would make this delicious corn chowder. We'd go to the Christmas Eve service at church and then drive around and look at all the lights. When we got home, we'd change into our jammies and then settle in for a delicious bowl of soup and some Christmas cookies by the fire.

I loved the soup exactly how it was and could not get enough of it. But, I guess a few years ago for some reason my mom changed her recipe slightly. Don't know why, but I discovered this change when I went to make it a few days ago and was sorely disappointed. I quickly called my sister and got the original recipe from her and thus my soup came out as a combination of the two recipes. But, after tasting it, I think I'm going to make it this way from now on. It was just as creamy and delicious as I remember and had just a little extra kick to it thanks to the few additions from the new recipe. Plus, this new version can be made in the crockpot instead of having to keep a constant eye on it at the stove.

MOM'S CHRISTMAS EVE CORN CHOWDER

½ lb. bacon, cut up
1 medium onion, chopped
4-5 medium potatoes, diced and peeled
1 c. water
15 ¼ oz. can whole kernel corn, drained
15 oz. can cream style corn
1 T. sugar
1 t. Worcestershire sauce
1 t. kosher salt
¼ t. pepper
½ block of Velveeta (large size block)
4 c. milk (I used skim and it still turned out really creamy)

Fry bacon until crisp; remove from pan. Add potatoes and onions to bacon drippings and sauté for 5 minutes. Drain. Combine all ingredients, but milk and cheese in crockpot; mix well. Cook on low about 5-6 hours or until potatoes are tender. Add milk and cheese; cook one more hour or until cheese is melted and soup is warmed through.

In my continuing quest into making yeast breads, I decided to make some French bread to go with the soup. I used the recipe found in my Southern Living cookbook and was very happy with the results. For little effort and few ingredients, I ended up with three beautiful loaves (that freeze well). The bread was so good and much more cost efficient than buying it (especially considering that my grocery store had 5lb bags of flour on sale for 99 cents a bag last week...I stocked up).

NO-KNEAD FRENCH BREAD

½ cup warm water (100° to 110°)
2½ tsp sugar
2 (¼-ounce) envelopes active dry yeast
1 cup boiling water
2 Tbsp butter
2 tsp kosher salt
1 cup cold water
6½ to 7 cups all-purpose flour
1 large egg, beaten
2 Tbsp milk

1. Combine first 3 ingredients in a 1-cup liquid measuring cup; let stand 5 minutes.

2. Combine boiling water, butter, and salt in a large mixing bowl. Stir until butter melts. Add cold water; cool mixture to warm (100° to 110°). Stir yeast mixture into liquid mixture. Add 2½ cups flour. Beat at medium speed with an electric mixer until blended. Gradually stir in enough remaining flour to make a soft dough.

3. Let dough stand in bowl 10 minutes. Stir gently for a few seconds; cover. Repeat gentle stirring every 10 minutes for the next 40 minutes.

4. Turn dough out onto a floured surface; divide into 3 equal portions. Roll each portion into a 13- x 8-inch rectangle on a floured surface. Roll up, jelly-roll fashion, starting with long side; pinch ends to seal.

5. Place each loaf, seam side down, on a separate greased baking sheet. Cover and let rise in a warm place (85°), free from drafts, about 40 minutes, or until doubled in bulk.

6. Make diagonal slits about ¼ inch deep down the length of loaves, using a sharp knife. Combine egg and milk in a small bowl, beating until blended. Brush gently over loaves after rising.

7. Bake at 400° for 20 to 25 minutes or until loaves sound hollow when tapped. (Bread freezes well.)

Yield: 3 loaves, 12 servings each

P.S. If you look closely in the picture, you can see where I didn't get my egg wash all the way over the bread. The less golden parts got missed.

DIY Day - Sock Monkey

Today is DIY day over at A Soft Place to Land. This week I'm linking up with one of my newest creations.

I just recently learned how to use my mother-in-law's sewing machine. If you've been here for any length of time, you know that I've wanted to learn how to use it for a long time but that it always freaked me out because it's one of those high speed commercial ones. This thing zips along with little room for error - unless you want to do a lot of seam ripping that is!

I finally learned how to use it because I've been assigned the job of sewing the velcro on the patches we have to make to stick on cows rears for one of the companies we run. Don't ask. It's part of life on a farm and all the different things associated with animal breeding.

Anyway, I decided to try my hand at making my oldest nephew a sock monkey for Christmas. Funds are a little tight this year so I'm trying to make as many things as possible. This project was CHEAP! All it cost me was the $3.24 for the pair of socks I found at Target. I already had the stuffing and buttons and thread. I orginally got the idea for the sock monkey from Monica at The Homespun Heart. She made them for her kids last Christmas. If you click over here, you'll find the link to the pattern/instructions we used.

So, what do you think? I'm pretty happy with the way he turned out and I think Braden will absolutely love him when he opens him on Christmas morning.

I won!!!

While letting my breakfast of honey wheat pancakes with apples settle, I decided to check my e-mail.

Remember how I entered Centsational Girl's faucet giveaway? Well, I did a little happy dance (ask my hubby he'll vouch for it) when I just saw her e-mail saying that I won!!!

WAHOO!!!

I now am the proud (soon to be) owner of a brand spankin' new faucet for my kitchen. I may not have walls or cabinets, but I have a faucet people. Oh yeah...moving on up in the world!

Thanks, so much Kate! I love your blog and am hoping to use many of your ideas as we continue to move forward with your renovation.

Finally Updated my Shop

I know it seems like it's been F-O-R-E-V-E-R, but I finally posted some new items at Divine Creations. Head on over and check them out when you get a chance.

I'm headed home soon to watch our Yankees take on the Angels (providing the rain holds off). What a great start to a weekend that looks like it should be filled with more crafting time! Yeah!

Coconut Marble Cake

(photo courtesy of Woman's Day magazine online)

We had company over on Sunday night so I figured it was the perfect time to try this recipe I saw in a recent issue of Woman's Day magazine.

I was so excited when my cake turned out EXACTLY like the one in the photo! While not my favorite cake ever, it was definitely delicious and one I'll most likely make again.

COCONUT MARBLE CAKE

Ingredients:
1.5 sticks (3⁄4 cup) unsalted butter, softened
1.5 cups sugar
2 tsp baking powder
2 tsp vanilla extract
4 large eggs
2.25 cups all-purpose flour
1 cup milk
1 tsp almond extract
1⁄2 cup semisweet chocolate chips
2 cups sweetened flaked coconut, finely chopped

Chocolate Drizzle: 1⁄2 cup semisweet chocolate chips melted with 1.5 tsp oil
Garnish: toasted coconut

1. Heat oven to 350°F. Grease and flour a 10-in. (12-cup) bundt pan.

2. Beat butter, sugar, baking powder and vanilla in a large bowl with mixer on high 3 minutes or until fluffy.

3. Add eggs, 1 at a time, beating well after each. On low speed, beat in flour in 3 additions alternately with milk in 2 additions, just until blended, scraping sides of bowl as needed. Stir in almond extract just to combine.

4. Melt chocolate chips in a medium glass bowl in microwave as pkg directs. Cool slightly, then stir in 1.5 cups batter until blended.

5. Stir coconut into remaining batter. Spoon 2 cups into prepared pan. Drop spoonfuls of chocolate batter into pan, leaving spaces between each dollop. Drop spoonfuls of coconut batter between chocolate batter. Repeat, alternating batters. Run a knife through batters to marbleize.

6. Bake 55 minutes or until a wooden pick inserted in center of cake comes out clean. Cool in pan on a wire rack 15 minutes before inverting cake on rack to cool completely.

7. Drizzle: Scrape melted chocolate into a small ziptop bag. Cut a tip off 1 corner and pipe chocolate over cake; sprinkle with toasted coconut.

NOTE: I've never had a problem with my Bundt cakes not wanting to come out of the pan until this cake. I greased and floured the pan the same way, but it still split in the middle as it was coming out. Thankfully I could cover up the seams with the chocolate drizzle and coconut. Next time I'll try greasing it even more I guess.